As you all know, I am a wealth of awesome and crucial parenting advice. Even though I have only been a mom for 5.5 months, I am a complete parenting expert. In an effort to pass all that I have learned on to other new moms, I have put together my top 3 parenting tips. Parents, these are words to live by.
1) Never allow your infant to chew on your fingers.
2) Never allow your infant to chew on corn cobs.
3) Never allow your infant to chew on bones.
(Editor’s Note: Please no one call Child Protective Services. I promise the kid is in no immediate danger!)